Erin- I hate all these responses you are getting. I wrote an article years ago for Scary Mommy venting about something when my kids were babies. It received hundreds of unkind comments telling me to “seek help” and one commenter even told me I didn’t deserve to have children.

You were venting. You were expressing how you feel. Motherhood, marriage, and parenting during a pandemic is not easy. You are entitled to have feelings and express them. And you did so beautifully.

I remember feeling a lot like you did when my boys were babies. My husband isn’t nearly as helpful. In fact he does nothing, BUT if he decides to pitch in, I feel like I’ve failed. I feel like he’s judging me for not getting it all done. I thought you were going that direction with your essay.

I don’t normally comment so long on other’s pieces. After I read the comments, I needed you to know that you were heard. And not judged. Keep writing. It helps. xo — Emme

I’m Emme, like the letter. Find me at or email at

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